1. Are your questions real questions or veiled assertions?
2. When did you stop beating your wife (or husband)?
3. How did you come up with the number 40? Did Rick Warren put you up to this?
4. Will you accept my apology for asking two questions instead of one in the previous question?
5. How many minds and hearts have you changed by asking 40 questions?
6. Is every teardrop really a waterfall?
7. If I answered all your questions, does this mean that I’m right?
8. If you answer “no” to the previous question, then what’s the point of asking so many questions?
9. Did you raise your hand before every question, or just for the first one?
10. How did you think of 40 questions? This is getting really tough. I need some coffee.
11. Is drinking coffee every morning an addiction?
12. Should Christians be addicted to any type of substance?
13. Have you stopped beating your wife yet?
14. Does love—the Christian agape stuff, not the secular sentimental stuff—really solve the ethical question about same-sex relations?
15. Do you know any gay person that likes to be called “a homosexual?”
16. Do you know any gay people?
17. Did you know that “the gays” is a terrible phrase and should never be used?
18. Did you know that Jesus was a strict ethical teacher, who held to a Jewish view of sexual immorality?
19. Did you know that God didn’t send his Son to affirm our desires and ensure that we can live the happiest life on earth?
20. Did you know that the Bible never uses the words “homosexual,” “homosexuality,” “gay,” or “lesbian?”
21. Did you know that most of the books written about what the Bible says about homosexuality in the last 30 years conclude that same-sex relations are not forbidden?
22. Did you know that many biblical scholars and historians who affirm same-sex relations also believe that the Bible condemns all forms of same-sex behavior?
23. If your questions are really veiled assertions, why not just give the assertions?
24. Did you know that I’m still having a really tough time coming up with more questions?
25. Did you know that the people of Sodom were attempting to gang rape Lot’s guests, and that SCOTUS didn’t pass a law sanctioning gang rape?
26. Did you know that the New Testament writers never pay much attention to Roman policy that didn’t reflect Christian values?
27. Did you know that the church has historically thrived more in contexts where it’s forced to be counter-cultural?
28. Did you know that I’m actually thinking of some real questions now?
29. Actually, my questions are veiled assertions. Ummm…question: did you know this?
30. Did you know that many younger evangelicals are shifting from non-affirming to affirming largely because of how LGBTQ people have been mistreated by the Church?
31. Did you know that many younger evangelicals are shifting from non-affirming to affirming also because of the hateful, unloving, angry, vitriolic rhetoric from non-affirming Christians?
32. Did you know that this is one of the reasons (in light of questions 30 and 31) why I speak out against the verbal abuse and unchristian tone of my non-affirming brothers and sisters?
33. Did you know that most Christians who believe that homosexuality is wrong can’t name 2-3 passages that say this?
34. What is the best affirming argument for same-sex relations?
35. Can you refute this argument?
36. What is the best non-affirming argument for same-sex relations?
37. Can you refute this argument?
38. Did you know that I’m probably going to get a lot of heat for this blog post from people on both sides of the debate, and that I don’t actually care?
39. Did you know that the Son of God was born in a manger and lived a humble life, partly to model for us a better way to live, a better way to dialogue, to listen to our pain and fears, to suffer in our stead, to love, confront, convict, proclaim, and serve those who don’t deserve anything but judgment?